My Small Village

When I decided to become a stay-home mum, I thought it was a job that suited me very well because I am an introverted homebody. I even had the nickname of ‘anti-social’ during my university days and the number of friends whom I hung out with regularly could be counted within one hand.

However just 6 months into my new job, the monotony of doing the same things over and over again and facing only a baby at home, made me realised that it was the toughest job I ever took on. Furthermore, most of my peers were either unmarried or had no children. I didn’t even have a smartphone which could take non-pixelated photos nor access Facebook. But I still manage to stay the course and persevere for about 7 years because gradually there were friends who came along to support me.

In my 8th year, my social circle started shrinking. At first I didn’t care much about it. But suddenly, my few close friends went back to full time work, some went back to part-time work and then others just stopped contacting for no reason in particular. All this happened in about 3 months.

My counsellor friend recently reminded me that ‘alone’ and ‘lonely’ have different meanings. You can be alone and not feel lonely. You can feel lonely even when you’re not alone. As an introverted homebody and anti-social person, I’ve always been alone. But for the first time in my life, I was alone and lonely. Loneliness is a terrible and scary feeling because it makes you focused only on one thing in your life – your negative self – all your weaknesses, past hurts, wrongdoings and fears. The loneliness then manifests itself as anger, envy, depression. And that was when I deleted my Facebook and Instagram accounts.

One day, God brought to mind a good friend – one who stopped contacting for no particular reason, and no longer active in the group chat. I was not in the mood nor in the ‘right mind’ to contact someone else but somehow I couldn’t stop worrying about this friend. Since she didn’t respond to my messages, I decided to write her a letter – a very honest letter – I asked how she was doing and I ended up telling her I had a problem. I think she was the second person (besides my husband) who would then know about my mental health state.

She read the letter and contacted me and we met, for one entire day. There was no drama of crying on each others shoulders, no aunty agony giving advice session but we had a very real conversation. After that meeting God brought to my mind a few other friends whom have been my support – actually only 2. But that 2 was enough to take away the focus on myself. I still felt alone but when I reached out to someone else, I didn’t feel lonely. I could live life again.

I can still count my close friends whom I can find support from, within one hand but now I’ve another hand for those whom I can reach out to. Even when you’re not okay, you can still reach out to others. It takes a village to “Live Life”, even it is a small village.

Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Ecclesiastes 4:12

For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them

Matthew 18:20 

A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.

Proverbs 11:25 

Valley Faith

I thought I was walking alone
The dark
The nights
The cold

I thought You were there
High up
Away
From me

All along You were there
Beside
Holding
My hand

All along You were there
Before
Leading
My steps

All along You were there
Above
Covering
My head

All along You were there
Behind
Watching
My back

Now I see You in the valley
Now I know You in the valley
Now I believe You in the valley
Now I trust You in the valley

You are not just God of the valley
You are God with me in the valley
The valley of sorrow and death
Is also the valley of hope and life

faithandhope

Then a man of God came and spoke to the king of Israel, and said, “Thus says the Lord: ‘Because the Syrians have said, “The Lord is God of the hills, but He is not God of the valleys,” therefore I will deliver all this great multitude into your hand, and you shall know that I am the Lord.’ ” – 1 Kings 20:28

But let us who are of the day be sober, putting on the breastplate of faith and love, and as a helmet the hope of salvation. – 1 Thessalonians 5:8

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful – Hebrews 10:23

For through the Spirit we eagerly await by faith the righteousness for which we hope. – Galatians 5:5

Through him you believe in God, who raised him from the dead and glorified him, and so your faith and hope are in God. – 1 Peter 1:21

Mealtime Devotions

In view of the current COVID-19 situation, staying home more often now means eating at home more often and gathering together more often too for meal times. We like to have conversations during dinner, maybe too much sometimes for the kids and they take really long to finish their food. But I truly believe that conversations are even much more important for such a time as this, particularly conversations about Jesus.

The idea of ‘Mealtime Devotions’ came up one day when I displayed a lettering artwork of a bible verse on the wall that’s next to our dining table. Prior to that, I have not display my artwork at home. Usually I would just file it up after it dries. But after reading Deuteronomy 6:7-9, I was inspired to display it on the wall, hoping it will be an invitation to talk about Jesus.

You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. – Deuteronomy 6:7-9

The first day during lunch, my 5-year old daughter  enquired about what I lettered as she has not learnt to read yet and we had a wonderful time talking about the verse. And then a few days later, during breakfast, my 8-year old son asked me as well and we had the opportunity again to talk about the meaning of the verse during breakfast. He then subsequently asked if I was going to put up new artwork with new verses. 

That inspired me to come up with 3 more and I digitalised them into printable cards. If you will like to kickstart conversations about God during meal times, you can purchase a set of these 4 Devotion cards (in PDF Files) at this link: https://payhip.com/b/23tB

Simply download and print them out on cardstock. The photo shown below is an A5 size design that is printed on A4 paper and then folded into half so that it can stand. On the back, there is the passage from which the lettered verse was take from and a simple reflection. 

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With these simple cards displayed near or on your dining table, I hope your family meal times will be full of conversations about Jesus’ love for us.

Lead me to the Rock

Lead me to the rock that is higher than I
Though I might take three steps forwards
And then two steps backwards
But now I know I’m still making progress
I will give thanks for this imperfect progress

Lead me to the rock that is higher than I
Though I might slip and fall
And even make a big splash
But this time I won’t be flailing my arms
I know I can reach out to hold His Hand

Lead me to the rock that is higher than I
Though I might have to start from the beginning
And be the slowest to ascend
But through it all, He sets my feet on a rock
I have Christ, the solid rock I stand upon

Rock

He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. – Psalm 40:2

From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. – Psalm 61:2

For in Scripture it says: “See, I lay a stone in Zion, a chosen and precious cornerstone, and the one who trusts in him will never be put to shame. – 1 Peter 2:6

Dream dreams

I dream of many dreams
But when I think about how I can’t fulfil them
I feel sad and discouraged
And think: what’s the point of dreaming

But I realise that dreaming is a privilege
I have a space and place to dream
Dreaming is a gift
Sharing with others my dreams gives me hope and joy

And even if the dream isn’t fulfilled by me
I’m grateful for that dream, for that joy in dreaming
And even if the dream isn’t fulfilled in my lifetime,
I’m glad that dream can be passed onto others

So when you dream, don’t see it as  building castles in the sky
When you dream,  see that you’re hanging stars in the sky
Commit the dreams to God
And you will experience His fullness in dreaming

Dreams

He took him outside and said, “Look up at the sky and count the stars–if indeed you can count them.” Then he said to him, “So shall your offspring be.” – Genesis 15:5

When I look at the night sky and see the work of your fingers— the moon and the stars you set in place— – Psalm 8:4

‘In the last days,’ God says, ‘I will pour out my Spirit upon all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy. Your young men will see visions, and your old men will dream dreams. – Acts 2:17